I'm writing this words with my heart broken, my tears rolling down my face like I'm 5 years old again, looking back to where I was in life, where am at and where I want to be... I was in a very difficult situation when I graduated in Med School, I was top 5 among my peers, at the time not even the number one student could've had a brighter future than mine, I was the type of person who corrected professors in their own field of medicine, I was the type of students that when a question was asked the whole classroom turn to me like it was a cartoon and I had the answer, if they had a survey about who was the most likely person to succeed in life I would've been the # 1 choice.I was on the move to take over the world when I got ill during my pediatrics internship, after severe pneumonia, shock, acute kidney failure and atrophy of my bone marrow I was about to die, on January 4th 2005 and later on the 8th due to a relapse, I was in coma the whole time... people all around the world started to pray for this young Doctor even inside the hospital that I was in; two different people saw Jesus Christ beside my bed taking care of me and after I woke up His Mercy was so great that I thought it only passed a day sleeping... I woke up, not been able to talk, walk, I had to be dialyzed every now and then. After I came out knowing that I was saved through a miracle... I had to go to the United States for surgeries because I had a tracheal stenosis amd couldn't breath, after more than 15 surgeries I lose count and the end of 2008 I was recovered but... with 60% of trachea function a permanent tracheostomy (an opening between the trachea and the skin).
Thanks to God by His sweet Mercy He preserved my vocal chords, because the mass which obstructs my trachea up to 40% makes it difficult to lose sound, Thanks my Lord! after the years I couldn't go back to medicine because I had an open door to infections (tracheostomy). In 2005 Jesus appeared to me in a dream and told me to speak to the world about His Mercy, His Mercy is the arms and legs of Love running to those who embraces His sacrifice for them, but the thing about Mercy is that you can't speak about it without Justice in the room... if Mercy are the arms and legs then Justice is the chore where this arms and legs are attached... There is NO MERCY WITHOUT JUSTICE and NO JUSTICE WITHOUT MERCY... Mercy alone is an illusion.
His Justice was applying on to me when I was ill... you see, I used to do God's work, I used to evangelize people, been in the church and even went to the passionist seminary to try and become a priest... but I preferred the world, got out from the seminary, got married, started a family, had 3 beautiful children, went to med school, got ill, graduated while i was having my surgeries and all of that was a good thing in the eyes of the world (except ill part), BUT... I forgot God on the way, I mean... I put God in the last place of my life when I used to go to Him telling him that he was # 1, having a family is a wonderful thing, a blessed thing and I have never regret not been a priest ever, I would've been a terrible one... I forgot God, put he world first and the thirst for its fruits.
Now years later I have a modest job, trying to spread the word every now and then with my beautiful family on my back and the thirst for Jesus greater than ever. When I started to spread Jesus Mercy I started attacking Communion in the hand... what happened? My family didn't want to hear about me talking about God anymore in my own house!.. I gave my testimony in my Church and what happened? At the beginning all cheered and praise God, now? I'm a know it all and a lunatic... even my priest won't speak to me anymore! I started preaching God in my job bit by bit and what happened? I was reprimanded and told not to pray the rosary again in my own time! I started to tell all about the mercy of God in Gloria.tv teaching what God likes and doesn't like (Atheists to heaven, Jesus pretended, Mary felt cheated and the HERETIC Evangelii Gaudium) what happened? They called me protestant, schismatic, vomit, antichrist, and lefebvrist... God through me called all of you for a sacrifice of prayer in which a 24 hour of Mercy chaplets are called on the 22nd in which you could pray for life whatever amount of chaplets you feel you could do to help us (but 24 is the goal)... and what happened the day after that was called? My wife and I are separating...
Do you think that I have come to establish peace on the earth? No, I tell you, but rather division. From now on a household of five will be divided, three against two and two against three; a father will be divided against his son and a son against his father, a mother against her daughter and a daughter against her mother, a mother-in-law against her daughter-in-law and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law.” Luke 12:51-53
My heart is broken... yes, am in pain... yes, I look back and I see my indifference... yes, I see all that have gone through...yes, I see the hearts of the faithful blind to the word of God in this NEW WORDLY CHURCH... yes, but my tears are rolling because God's love doesn't forsake me, Jesus is here with me as I'm writing you my brothers in Christ and it is my wish that He makes you and me His, forever... May the two Lights of Mercy which cones out of Jesus heart be your guide and may Jesus comes and take all of us with Him to see and live the Father for eternity. Amen
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